Thursday, March 22, 2007

Moon's smile has broken all dams

This song of mine will wind its music around you,
my child, like the fond arms of love.
The song of mine will touch your forehead
like a kiss of blessing.
When you are alone it will sit by your side and
whisper in your ear, when you are in the crowd
it will fence you about with aloofness.
My song will be like a pair of wings to your dreams;
it will transport your heart to the verge of the unknown.
It will be like the faithful star overhead
when dark night is over your road.
My song will sit in the pupils of your eyes,
and will carry your sight into the heart of things.
And when my voice is silenced in death,
my song will speak in your living heart.


This evening I decided to do what I like to do and not what I have to do. As it gets warmer in Montreal, I decided it's time for some pleasure. I went to the computer and sat for hours listening to Rabindra Sangeet.

আলো আমার আলো ওগো, আলো ভূবন ভরা
আলো নয়ন ধোওয়া আমার আলো হৃদয় হরা ।
নাচে আলো নাচে ও ভাই, আমার প্রাণের কাছে -
বাজে আলো বাজে ও ভাই, হৃদয়বীণার মাঝে
জাগে আকাশ, ছোটে বাতাস, হাসে সকল ধরা ।
আলোর স্রোতে পাল তুলেছে হাজার প্রজাপতি
আলোর ঢেউয়ে উঠল মেতে মল্লিকা মালতী ।
মেঘে মেঘে সোনা, ও ভাই যায়না মানিক গোনা -
পাতায় পাতায় হাসি ও ভাই, পুলক রাশি রাশি ।
সুরনদীর কূল ডুবেছে সুধা-নিঝর-ঝরা।
- অচলায়তন


I don't know what it was, maybe the rains. It drizzled this evening. Somehow I always get pulled towards Rabindra Sangeet whenever I see the rains. Maybe it's the soothing effect. The soothing effect that rain has on dry earth, same effect does Rabindra Sangeet have on my soul. Remember that frangrance of wet soil after first rains? Thats what I feel when I listen to the maestro's songs.



Bhalobashi Bhalobashi
Ai shure kache doore
Jole sthole bajai baashi
Bhalobashi Bhalobashi

Murder He wrote...


Was Bob killed? This seems to have become the biggest question in cricket today. Ironically, no one seems to be concerned with the original question, who will win the world cup!
This case seems to be straight out of a Agatha Christie novel. Initially declared as a natural death, then traces of poison are found. A scheduled press conference by the high and mighty ICC officials is cancelled. Then, there are reports that he was strangled. And now, reports surface that Scotland Yard will investigate the case. Sherlock Holmes in Jamaica!
Bob, even after dying has remained in the news, much like he used to during his lifetime, especially as the coach of South Africa and then Pakistan. If he has really been murdered, then it's unfortunate. The killer entered the wrong team's hotel, to murder the wrong coach.
This World Cup will go down in history as one of the most popular ones for all the wrong reasons. And believe me, u ain't seen anything yet! Theres a lot more to come!!!

Monday, March 19, 2007

Life is Tough

I never thought life as a student again would be so tough. It is not about adapting to the study format in Canada. It's purely about cash. Getting a job to survive here is such a Herculean task. Purely on this experience I would never advise any international student to come here for any form of studies. The government rules are a two edged sword for students. Firstly, they wouldn't allow you work off campus for the first six months and then no one on campus is willing to employ a new student. Past experience and credentials are plainly ignored.
It seems not only is student life tough, life after is worse. I recently met an ex student from my MBA program, who is returning back to India.
Reason: No one was willing to consider him for a position, even with about 4 years of experience in companies like Suzuki and Honda.
As I write, I listen to "Jene Shune aami beesh korechi paan". Literal translation is, "Willingly I have drank poison". I ask myself the same question tonight.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Mambo Italiano!

Saying that I was shocked this time on my birthday would be an understatement. I was not only shocked by my new set of friends,in Montreal but I also managed to shock myself. Usually, back home I would expect my friends to turn up at my place at 12am. However it was least expected here. I had no clue these guys n gals would pull this off on me. So it was a real surprise and a good one at that.
Surprises didn't end here. I was expecting a hectic day, what with two classes and work to finish for two presentations due next week. I finish attending a draining session by a marketing guru in the first half of my Marketing class. It's break time, just trying to get my nerves settled as I know I will get my marketing mid term marks after about an hour. I hear someone calling out,"Ramie". I turn expecting to see my Marketing team member,a french girl,here as an exchange student. It is her. But wait! She has a donut in her hand, with a candle,lit up. The girls start singing "Happy Birthday" and boy am I taken aback. Amazing gesture from someone who has known only for a couple of weeks. I didn't even know how to thank her!
Everyone kept asking me what I did on the night of March 8th. All I can say is I had hot Italian dinner. Italians make them delicious, don't they ;)

Sunday, March 04, 2007

Spring is here!

This weekend it snowed a lot in Montreal. However it was the same snow that helped me enjoy the spring festivals of Holi. Throwing snowballs on the streets of Montreal at midnight, on two consecutive nights! Am I having a ball or wat?
I think the turning point was my trip to Toronto. It liberated me. Liberated me of all the feelings of guilt and helplessness. March in Montreal seems lovely now. So bring out the wine, I am here to party!

Friday, February 09, 2007

This life is a strange story...

"There are no permanent friends or enemies in life"
Who said that? Well, I just did

I say it from personal experience. I am not angry with life, I am just suprised. I never thought, for being happy I will have to take care of my pains. For smiling, I never thought I will have repay the debts for smiling. I once read somewhere that every friendship has a common motive behind it. It's either work,money or an effort to run away from lonliness. I never believed it. I always thought of friendship as a pure relation, where we choose whom to spend time with. However,manyatimes life leaves you with very few choices. Life has taught me it's true, the hard way. Come to think of it, I am happy that I did learn it.
It is true that frienships do have a common motive and once that's over friends just turn into memories. I also know that there are no permanent enemies. Only your very close friend can be your worst enemy. Because your closest friend will know your weaknesses the best. Do I feel like writing "Strangers at last sight" again? Not yet. Not this time.

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Still Confused!

Timing can be the key factor in life. I still keep wondering what life would have been, how life would have been if I had said certain things to certain people when I felt I should.
The first memory that comes flashing to my mind is when I gave her a treat for getting my first job. She was my closest friend. Sadly thats what she still is. I still wonder, sitting in freezing Montreal, should I have proposed her that night. We sat for candlenight dinner at RiverView.
It was the perfect setting. But I didn't say anything to her. Maybe I was afraid of being turned down. Maybe because I didn't want to hurt her. It broke my heart when she said that she thought I was going to propose to her that night. However the moment had passed and I had lost an opportunity.
I am still confused whether I did the right thing the wrong way!

Friday, January 12, 2007

Jaane Kya Chahe Mann Bawra


Do you know how sometimes you are sitting in a coffee shop and you hear a song and the song brings back some memories. Some memories that are sweet, sometimes bitter, sometimes fond and manyatimes they make your heart too heavy for your chest to hold back.
I can go back in time when I hear some songs. Some songs take me back to my schooldays in Bombay. Some remind me of my friends in Wadias. And a couple take me back to the place, where i was most peaceful. An open door, a big roof and wind blowing leaves of a long tree, like pine. "Countryroads take me home"......why can't we turn back time.
My latest favourite is "Jaane kya Chahe Mann" from a movie called "Pyaar ke Side effects". Simply because it reminds of my last few days in Poona, spent with some special people.
I have been in Montreal for just over two weeks now, I am sure I will also remember this period with some song. Right now I don't know which one, maybe in the future I will.
And there are those songs which remind of some people rather than some specific time. Like there is "Kuch to hua hai" from Kal Ho Naa Ho. Whenever I hear it, theres just one face in front of my eyes and its not Preity. And theres mon favourite French song "Tout les Garcons". That brings back some French memories. As strange as it may sound, it reminds me of a French in Poona not Montreal.
Jaane kya chahe mann bawra,akhiyan mere sawan chala............

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Aim


We take birth in a country, in a city, in a family. We get a religion. We get a race. How is it decided where will we be born? Karma? Maybe. Then we grow up, some go to school,few to college. Manyatimes not knowing what they actually want to be in life. Then try to find a job. In which field, don't know. Maybe the one which offers more money. Start working. Enjoy the money initially. However with passage of time you may realise that you aren't happy anymore.
The mundane work makes you feel like a robot. What do we work for, one will ask oneself. Maybe it's time to switch. Or maybe it's time to change or your profession.
We keep looking for change so that life becomes better. When it does get better we feel we still lack something. Why are we never satisfied? Do we even know what we look for?
As a kid I always thought age brings maturity and emotional stability. But I was wrong. With age we tend to think more about our future. This makes the mind unstable. With age relations become older, making you feel more attached to people. Thus making you emotionally weak.
Strength is achieved by being content. Content with life. You can be content if you have an aim in life. However the most difficult thing in life can be knowing your real aim.

Monday, January 01, 2007

Sudden Death

If ever I thought that I was feeling sad while writing a post, it couldn't be more than tonight. After reaching here in Montreal, not only have I felt as if I have a new life but also that I had a sudden death. Seperated from my parents,family and friends, in a different world. Feels like death. Well I never thought I would experience death in this lifetime.
Although I was having a good time on new years eve, surrounded by new people, the moment I got alone the feeling of loss sucked me in again. Loss on an entire life of 25 years. I still ask myself, will it be worth it? Am I not losing out on precious time with my family. I don't know if things will ever be the same again. I have seen the cruel face of time and that is what scares me for the future.

Friday, December 29, 2006

Montreal

Montreal welcomed me with snow. As soon as my flight landed it started snowing. What does that signify? I don't know! I am too bothered to think of metaphors right now. The last 2 days have been full of nostalgia and self doubt. Did I make the right decision? Was it worth leaving my cozy life in Pune? Lets see, I will know soon.
The city is beautiful and I loved the walk down St. Catherine. Hoping to make interesting freinds here. Happy new year to Everyone, I hope mine is very happy and...

Friday, December 15, 2006

End of an Era

It does feel like end of an era. An era has ended in my life, the era of HSBC. Peut etre, era of Indian software companies. Today was my last day at HSBC. I feel sad. Take back really happy meories, of the events, the people, the experience. My first onsite trip, London, Canary wharf, a dream office. Then the fun I had with the team back in India.
Yesterday while returning from office, as I sat on the pillion seat, passing by GLT 1.0, thoughts came rushing to my mind. I suddenly realised it would be my last day tomorrow. I could remember the winter evenings of last year, me sharing a joke with a colleague, on the Level 5 terrace. The scene was beautiful, it was twilight and the Yerwada bridge was twinkling, courtesy, the traffic on it.
I remember when I left Nihilent, a good friend of mine asked me if I was feeling a little sad. I said no and I wasn't lying. Leaving Nihilent excited me! However now I understand what she was talking about. I will certainly miss HSBC.
Maybe the feeling is more because I got a splendid farewell. Not only did my team gift me a huge card and parker pens(yeah mon fav. brand) but so did the reporting team. I just didn't know how to thank them!
Bye Bye Kalyani Nagar, GLT, HSBC...I won't write a comment saying
"HSBC AN 16/12/2006:Added for Defect#20006" anymore!

Au Revoir...

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Grand Success, time to bid farewell

It's strange but I never thought that a 2 -minute performance could ever generate so much of adulation. I was hoping that the play turns out well. Not exactly. It turned out exceedingly well. I mean, the crowd was cheering and laughing in each scene. A big relief really, as I wasn't only an actor in the play but I had also written the story. So the acceptance of the story by the crowd mattered a lot to me. And also it was great to see that each and every actor performed amazingly in the final show.....too good guys.

I had an idea that people will like my role because of the reaction I received in the rehersals and also my department head's reaction during the review practice. But I had never imagined the kind of things people said to me yesterday night. Imagine this, a professional choreographer comes up to me and says"Do you perform dance shows professionally? Your dance step where you go around the stage was mind blowing"

Someone else "Have you learnt classical dancing" I say"No" He says "R u sure ?"

There were many who told me I was fabulous especially the dance but the best one was when this guy told me

"You were the performer of the night"

and believe me there were many other performances that night which were of amazing standards. And what was it with the photographs? Was it my costume? After the skit whenever I got up to go the food bar or to the restroom, people would stop me on the way and take a picture, whether it would be on their handicams, digital cameras or even mobile phones! Thanks for appreciation guy n gals, it feels great for sure.

There is no doubt that the CIBM townhall was of a much higher standard than the HSBC Annual day, whether it be the compering, singing or the dances. My favourite though was the "Kabuliwala" song sung by Jayant. He is too good a singer not to be singing professionally.

I hope I can get a CD of that night's performance. I just want to see what exactly did I do right:)
I thought I was doing a comedy sequence on stage but being complemented in such a manner for my dance was suprising to say the least. These last days at HSBC have been memorable ones, not that the earlier ones were not. Will talk about that some other day.

So the verdict is out, "Munnu Ka Chirag" which released on Friday, 8th December 2006 at the Elysium grounds, Koregaon Park was a superhit!!! Come to think of it and I realise we ended up making up a Bollywood masala skit. The skit had serious scenes, it had comedy, a romantic scene, a song for almost every character and yes some action too! Madam H in a action packed role:) . We made a bollywood potboiler guys...haha. Let the whole cast and crew take bow. "Guuyhhhzzz all of you were fahntashtic."



PS: Couldn't use Salaam E Ishq songs for the cast intro at the end as the play was getting stretched beyond it's time limit. But I am sure the song would have gone perfectly with the crowd mood.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Walk down memory lane


Thinking of a story, writing script and dialouges, is new for me. But not acting. That too acting out an Arabian Nights character in a musical. Now, what does that remind me of:)))

Abdullah! Few of my fondest memories. Those were days of fun and enjoyment.

Not to say that I am not having fun this time round. It's always fun to act and dance. The rehersals are fun filled, with loud laughter and crazy thinking. Hope it turns out the way I am imagining it to be. I wait patiently for Friday. My play releases on a Friday...hheeehee

Dream come True?

PS: Salaam -E - Ishq has fantastic tracks. Thinking of using the title in the play.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Love,Pain and Destiny

Sitting in front of my PC at home, alone, on a chilly saturday evening, I put words to my pain. I don't know whether I am mature enough to understand love yet. But I do know that I have had many a tyrsts with love and it's siblings. Pain and Destiny.Someone once told me that a person can fall in love just once in his entire life. I rubbished this view, as I felt I was capable of loving more than once. Or maybe I was just hoping I could fall in love again. A few days back I found out, I have failed miserably.

Sometimes I felt that distances can reduce feelings. If things are not going to work out, maintain a distance, feelings will subside on their own. After all it was a tried and tested formula. But it didn't happen this time. The first rendezvous itself brought all those feelings to the surface. Failed love is like that wound which will never heal.

"You miss someone the most when she's sitting in front of you and you know you can't have her"

My office has two buildings, about 500m apart. Often while walking to the parking of the other building, it gets dark and lonely. I keep missing that someone who should have been walking besides me. Who should have been there to keep me company on cold nights. But when I reach my car, it's just me.

Manyatimes I feel helpless at the hands of destiny. Although we can make our own destinies, there are somethings, especially in matters of the heart that we can never change. So even if I know that these feelings will only bring me pain and misery, I can't help it. So what do I do? Go somewhere far far away and hope that I can forget my past. Hope that I can change my destiny.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Umrao Jaan

Before going to see Umrao Jaan I read a bad review on the net. I thought to myself, whenever I read a bad review, expectations go low and I invariably end up liking the movie. Little did I know that the movie would have such an effect on me that I would end up writing a review.







To put it in short, the movie before interval is boring, very boring...HYPER BORING!!!
If it weren’t for my patience and the Rs 130/- ticket I would have left by interval time. After the interval it has good pace and story moves on quite well. The movie is 2 hr long before interval. Add to that a string of songs, most of which fail to connect with you. Don’t blame Anu Malik, Javed Akhtar or Alka Yagnik. The songs have good quality of music, ghazal lovers will like them. “Salaam” is hummable. “Agle Janam”, the folk song, can rivet the viewers to their seats for a few moments. The lyrics, very well written by Javed Akhtar and beautifully sung by Alka Yagnik. Then why do the songs bore the viewers so much? Sheer numbers?
Not exactly. It’s Aishwarya! She isn’t Umrao Jaan. She ain't the Umrao we knew. She does all the dance steps well but without the “ada” or finesse. She looks stunnigly beautiful, wearing glamorous outfits but there is no soul. There are tears in her eyes but no emotions on her face. Although she has perfomed quite well, she fails to enthrall viewers in the songs.If only looking beautiful good could make a movie hit, she would have more hits to her credit than her contemporaries.

The saving grace of this movie is Abhiseik Bachan and to some extent Shabana Azmi.
Shabana Azmi potrays her character perfectly. Abhisheik brings passion into his scenes with Ash(although she looks older to him in some scenes). His dialouge delivery is perfect and very convincing.
My favourite part of this movie was the interval. I have just one message for the director of this movie, “Jo ab kiye ho Dutta, aisa na kijo. Agle baar, aisi bore movie na bana ke dijo!”

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

The Grinch whole stole victory from Indian Cricket

When Greg Chappell successfully ousted Ganguly from the Indian team, I felt hurt.Not only as a Bengali but as an Indian too. It had bruised my self pride as an Indian that the most successful captain of my country's team had been kicked out by a foreignerwho didn't seem to care about Indian cricket and also Indians.

I have always been a firm believer in the karma theory. Your Karma shall follow you. Thou shall reap what thou sow. The ousting of Ganguly was plotted by Chappell and some board members and Dravid helped these guys execute their evil plans. So much evil was bound to reap failure. That is exactly what the Indian team has been receiving in the last 6 months.

Now comes the news that Chappell's term will not be extended after the next world cup.I would have preferred seeing him kicked off before the next world cup. Why sacrifice the world cup? As far as it goes for Dravid, I am sure he will also meet his fate.He will also be betrayed by someone he fully trusted. Lets just wait n watch!

Friday, October 13, 2006

Maa Durga


Maa Durga
Originally uploaded by abhi8381.
Durga Puja ends once again and we wait for next year, once again!